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Aya Madre is a shamanic healing center outside of Iquitos, Peru. It is owned and operated by master Shipibo shaman Estela Pangoza and her family. Maestra Estela is a renowned healer who works with the power of ayahuasca and mother nature as part of an ancient system of holistic treatment. Come heal your physical, emotional and/or spiritual illnesses, and connect more deeply to nature, yourself and higher states of well-being.
Maestra Estela has owned this property and been hosting a wide range of guests, clients and patients for over 5 years. In 2018 the center was officially founded as “Aya Madre.” Maestra Estela’s vision is to open a space deep in the heart of the jungle for people from the around the world to experience the deep and profound healing of mother nature.
While “ayahuasca tourism” has boomed in the Amazon jungle, with tourists seeking the sometimes thrilling visions ayahuasca can offer, Maestra Estela practices a traditional form of Shipibo plant medicine. This tradition sees ayahuasca as one of many master plants which along with a range of other plant treatments, can act as a powerful diagnostic tool, purgative, and ultimately, help us connect more deeply with the healing power within ourselves and all around us. This form of Shipibo plant medicine has been practiced for thousands of years, and at Aya Madre guests will be immersed in the full system of healing under Maestra Estela’s care and guidance.
As far as we know, this center is unique in being 100% owned and operated by a female, indigenous shaman. This is no small task in a world of shamanism dominated by men. Maestra Estela provides a safe, nurturing, empowering environment where you can experience the deep healing of the jungle, Ayahuasca, and the Shipibo plant tradition.
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ayapath4
May 6, 2023 at 10:48 amIt is not easy to put all my negative experiences in this center together in one review but I will give it a try, so people will know what they are going into, as it is an overrated place because of just one documentary, which does not reflect the reality of now.
First of all, I want to say that I have been to many retreat centers and this was the most disorganized and the one where guests are the least cared about. Actually all they care about is money. First, we went there especially for Maestra (we are a couple experienced with medicine), but we barely saw her. There were 2, sometimes 3 other Maestros in the ceremonies, which I am not sure about their expertness, as they were all singing the same Icaros to everyone, all the time, with their laud voices, which most of the time feels like they were angry and just shouting, whether there is someone in front of them or not. They start singing all together, all through the ceremony, without any break. And their Icaros not even beautiful, sorry.
Maestra might be good at what she is doing, her Icaros is good, but the center is managed very poorly and you do not even see her around, sometimes she is not even in the ceremonies, so I did not get the point why we were there. The food you will get is probably the simplest, just some, and same, veggies and soup every night. Sometimes they even forget you, or cook very late. You must feel lucky if you get any fruits from time to time. The plants they give you for the dieta is most of the time missing (you go there for plants, but there are no plants), it takes days to bring them (which actually center is not very deep in the jungle, the staff travels to city all the time but somehow they do not bring the plants or food you paid for). And also real Dieta is not done in this way. Maestra gives you 5 or 6 plants, which should not happen in a dieta. If you want to go for a real dieta, you should do it only with 1 plant, in an isolated space. They sell this retreats as a dieta, but it is a lie in this case. They even cook pasta, which should not be even in just ayahuasca dieta. This is the care they give about you.
Apart from these, as I learned after from another visitors, one of the Maestros, who is from the family, had abused a woman guest. I was not planning to write about my experience until I learned this. The center is owned by a woman but I don’t think it is a safe space for women, if a Shaman from her family sees the right on himself to do this, it means Maestra creates space for it. And the place is also full of male workers, who just cut the trees all day to build new facilities. It is just uncomfortable.
This center might be cheaper than many others but this is the quality that you get.
afellowtraveler
April 19, 2023 at 9:10 amIn early 2023, Maestro Andres (who from my understanding is Maestra Estela’s nephew) was one of the shamans participating in ceremonies at Aya Madre. He rubbed quite a few people who came to the center the wrong way with his repetitive icaros (he seemed to sing basically the exact same icaro in every ceremony to every single participant), strange ceremony behavior (e.g., falling asleep, sitting with his legs spread wide open), and questionable interactions with women (suggestive commentary, hugging, and trying to remain in touch with them after they left the center).
Though he made some people uncomfortable, I don’t think any of us thought he would cause real harm. Then, we learned that he had unprotected sex with one of the female visitors to the center when she was feeling strong after effects of the medicine and wasn’t in a normal state of mind (i.e., could not give proper consent).
In my humble opinion, this is an egregious betrayal of the trust that is placed in the shamans we work with and a very serious form of abuse.
I’ve been to Aya Madre multiple times and experienced much healing at the hands of Maestra Estela. I have (and will continue to have) deep appreciation for what she has done for me personally as well as respect and admiration for her as a shaman.
However, after this event has taken place, I no longer feel safe and comfortable at the center and will not be returning there in the future. I also can’t in good conscience recommend female guests to come to the center as given the way things are currently run and operated (e.g., multiple visiting male shamans coming to the center and having access to the entire grounds), there isn’t much preventing such an event from recurring.
At the time of writing this, Maestra Estela had been made aware of the situation and though she said she would no longer work with Maestro Andres, nothing else had been done and Maestro Andres was still planning on opening his own center in the summer. Worse, the stories that were shared surrounding the incident afterwards were that it only happened “in a vision” or didn’t happen at all, which frankly seems like a coverup to try to protect the reputation of the center and prevent people from learning what actually took place.
Being under the influence of a powerful hallucinogenic such as ayahuasca can make one really vulnerable and affect normal decision-making, so it’s critically important that taking these substances is done in a safe and protected environment. Please do your own research, read reviews, and speak to previous attendees and volunteers of centers to ensure that the place you choose to go to will truly be a healing experience.
okjadebird
February 23, 2023 at 12:54 pmIn restrospect, I can’t recommend this to folks seeking healing and a fresh perspective on life. The risks are too great and mostly hidden, not talked about in this community of “love and light”. Vulnerable folks who are thinking of going alone, or with people they don’t know that well, should probably stay closer to home.
If you’ve done exhaustive research, taken stock of your own mental & physical health, and still feel that you MUST go, I’d suggest the following:
1) Don’t expect much and 2) Don’t let your guard down. Go with a trusted companion who is much more grounded and much less interested in altered states than you are. Ideally, this person really knows themselves mentally and emotionally, is not desperately seeking a “spiritual experience”, and will protect you should something go awry.
This person should definitely NOT stand to benefit — financially, reputationally, or romantically, for instance — from pursuading you to try risky substances known to lower your defenses and inhibition. Never let anyone convince you to ingest things unless you know they actually have YOUR best interests (over their own) at heart.
This review is based on my experience at Aya Madre and its aftermath. While the 10-day stay itself went smoothly, with time I realized that I’d simply been lucky. A lot could have gone awfully wrong. I’d been lulled by a former manager who worked there into believing that this was ‘a safe place for women traveling solo’. (I guess he was very into wanting to act the “feminist ally”.)
Well, the tambos (small personal huts) had no locks on the doors and only screens as windows. This would be a haven for voyeurs — maybe it has been for a while. There’s a good chance you’ll be ogled.
Be ready for inappropriate, amateurish actions by a staff member. The manager while I was there somehow decided it’d be a good idea to talk about sex dreams the night before. We were 3 women (all under 35, one in her early 20s) and he was the only male (late 30s). THIS was supposed to be our main guide while under the influence of powerful drugs?!
What brings you to Aya Madre is Maestra Estela’s reputation, but the staff (many of them volunteers happy to get free lodging and ‘medicines’) are the ones you’d need to trust. And I’m just not convinced.
Beware of their “No refunds ever” policy, which will make you feel pressured to stay even if you are made very uncomfortable by their actions.
Emotional manipulation, which is often subtle, is also very serious when it comes to mind-altering drugs. Why might it be incredibly prevalent and damaging here?
1. This is a gathering place for folks struggling with inner turmoil and/or emptiness, which makes them vulnerable to being abused (and in some cases abusing others). You don’t have to take my word for it — check out the negative reviews across various retreats.
2. The commercial ayahuasca scene makes for an awkward bunch of incentives and power inequalities. Poor Peruvian people both appreciate and resent the visitors. There is money to be made from these people who are seeking help, who open up about their traumas (leaving them vulnerable to manipulation).
At the same time, the ayahuasca industry has robbed the Peruvian communities of a sacred practice by making it less available to them. This is driven by relationships that are very extractive (both ways) and brief, while laden with lots of meaning. In my view, this is not a setting conducive to safe and deep healing for “seeking” types.
3. There is no oversight (say, by a neutral third party or regulatory agency) to address conflicts and accidents. My recent experience with a so-called “mediator” with Aya Madre was deeply dispiriting and frustrating. There was no willingness to admit mistakes, face issues squarely and remedy them.
One of the agreements that came from the (otherwise impotent) “mediation” was that a new volunteer policy be adopted, one that calls for proper vetting before anyone is hired. A conflict of interest policy would also make sense. It’s been 2 months and that mediator is still dragging his feet on these common sense remedies. It’s pathetic and disrespectful.
Final things to note:
-You will have no internet and almost no phone reception. Nothing about this was on the website until much later. Where is the nearest hospital and how can you be sure you’d get there in an emergency? NO ONE from Aya Madre so much as mentioned any of this.
-Staff turnover is terribly high. This means zero accountability. Your main contact there may not be working there after just a few months, and the new folks just won’t care enough about your concerns.
Sure, it’s more affordable than many other centers. But it means you must take extra precautions, and depending on how well you’re doing, managing all these risks can really get in the way of healing there. Remember, you are paying hundreds of dollars of your hard-earned money for the opportunity. Consider saving it and healing closer to where you are now.
PhoenixRising
October 2, 2022 at 8:28 amI recently completed my third stay at Aya Madre.
My first two stays (two months last year, five weeks earlier this year) were pure magic. I LOVED the ceremonies, the plants, the retreat grounds (full of so much healing energy!), and Maestra Estela’s healing. The other Maestros were also very knowledgeable, compassionate, and helpful. I truly felt I’d found a spiritual home at last, a place of healing to which I could return again and again.
I am heartbroken to have to use the past tense, as I truly loved Aya Madre, and a part of me still does.
However, it has changed. This recent stay (five weeks) found me at a very different Aya Madre.
It felt rundown, haphazard, disorganized. Treatments and medicines were often promised and never given. My food preferences (not exorbitant ones by any means) were not respected. There was little follow-up with the pasajeros to see how they were doing, leaving some puzzled and adrift. (Though, to her credit, Maestra did always make herself available for questions). The plants we were asked to diet often changed, without explanation.
A specific example: I badly stubbed a toe on a protruding root, possibly breaking it. It got badly swollen and made walking difficult (I still feel it!). Maestra noticed it the next day and did give me a treatment…which was the ONLY treatment anyone would ever give me. No one—not Maestra, not any of the other Maestros—ever again tried to help, even while seeing me hobbling around Aya Madre in visible pain.
Excepting a brief period at the beginning, there was also no admin and no translator. Pasajeros who happened to be fluent in Spanish were thrust into the translator role—which took away from their focus on the dietas and inner work. For the money pasajeros pay to stay there, surely these services should be provided?
The volunteers (and pasajeros unofficially volunteering) were a mixed bag. Some were genuinely kind and did their utmost to help. Others were utter narcissists, monopolizing attention, imposing their warped will on the pasajeros instead of being there to help them, offering opinions where none were requested, etc. One, in particular, repeatedly pressured me to eat meat, which runs contrary to my deeply held beliefs. Being told this did nothing to deter him!
Moreover, the dynamic involving some of the volunteers was weird, as some were from the same geographical area and often hung out together, leading to a clique-ish atmosphere.
And, truth be told, I do not feel healed. Almost all of the ailments I trusted Aya Madre to cure are still there. I noticed little to no improvement in my condition as the days turned into weeks. When told this, Maestra expressed sympathy, and I do believe it was legitimate—but she did very little to actually help.
By far the most shocking, though, was what happened in my fifth and final week.
Not long after I arrived, Maestra Estela said she may call upon a vegetalisto doctor to help me. Nothing happened until the fifth week, when she finally brought one to Aya Madre. We conversed, and he promised to cure me in four sessions.
Now, this should have sent up red flags right away—a true healer NEVER promises a cure.
As the patient, I was desperate for relief and thus overlooked this (lesson learned: never again!). But Maestra Estela should have spotted the red flag straightaway. She did not—or if she did, she said nothing. Instead, she turned me over to his care.
He turned out to be—to put it bluntly—an utter quack. I placed my trust in him (since Maestra Estela trusted him) and received three treatments from him. The result? Not only did my ailments not improve, but one—a skin condition—worsened drastically. Will post a photo below (don’t view while eating!).
The treatment also made me very depleted and rundown. When I brought this up, I was either ignored outright or told to “drink more [insert plant medicine name].” As you may have guessed, the suggested remedy did nothing whatever to help.
Now, I gave it two stars instead of one. This is because one thing remains spectacular and utterly magical: the ceremonies. The medicines, the icaros…just wow. Pure magic.
Sadly, though, I cannot recommend Aya Madre at this point. It WAS a truly special place. It still holds a place in my heart, and I hold out hope that the old magic will somehow return. However, this would require making changes—and, as undeniably gifted a healer as Maestra Estela is, she is extremely set in her ways.
It breaks my heart. This truly was a place of magic and joy. Sadly, not anymore.
melissa.mantejkaur
September 13, 2022 at 10:15 amDo not trust this center!
I’ve never met a group of more highly manipulative, deceitful and spiteful people in my entire life. Super sleazy hustler vibes. Con artists. Highly unprofessional. They “yes” people to death, making all sorts of claims as to what they can do for others both in services and in healing, and then do not deliver. Then compulsively lie, making up stories/excuses (as to why they didn’t deliver) as it fits their needs and lack of willingness to be supportive and empowering for guests.
Their entire website is fraudulent. Do not believe anything it says and do not send them money Friends and Family (which again is fraud). When I pointed out I was not receiving what I purchased and wanted a refund so I could leave, they refused. They clearly just want to make money. They spend money carelessly, putting extravagant personal gifts as priority over guest care, compromising things such as food (basic human need) and medicine which is promised and part of the cost of the stay. Highly negligent. Highly overpriced. They are using westerns for money.
The environment and community is not peaceful. Constant drama and fighting among staff. The staff will withhold food and medicine from guests intentionally to try to take power when they feel triggered or angry, a form of bullying and retaliation. I had to call the US Embassy and the support of qualified professionals and abuse survivor groups as my health was diminishing rapidly (such as suicidal ideation) due to the abuse, which they ignored and refused to help. This is by far the worst experience of my life. It’s like a game, and we are used and abused for their personal amusement. Sick.
The Maestros are unprofessional, belligerent, immature and arrogant. They and the family are manipulating and abusing guests, such as emotionally (shaming) and sexually (inappropriate touching of guests and self with sexual advances). Not a safe place for women. Its like Never Land, where lost boys never have to grow up, and childish/unprofessional behavior among staff is allowed. No accountability. It’s like being in pre school with no teacher/supervision.
The “volunteers” are just as bad; self serving, manipulative, defensive, do not advocate for guests and their safety, and are not qualified to care for/support others. They also have extreme boundary violations and sexual advances towards women, which the family allows. Do not believe any of the communications you have with them.
This center takes your money but does not deliver on the agreements made as far as the services, care and experience you’ll receive, while they abuse you. Do not tell them your wounds (what you’d like to work through) because they will use that as bait for manipulation. Do not waste your time/energy/money here! There is NO integrity. Do not believe anything they say. This is a total tourist trap, no longer sacred. Please protect yourself.